08 September 2014

Dark Matter

I know why Robin Williams took his life.

You see, I believe to him the thought of death was more comforting than the thought of having Parkinsons Disease.

While I obviously do not know precisely what was in Mr. Williams' had, I believe I understand the (ir) rationality.

I have to start chemotherapy next week for breast cancer. The thought of it TERRFIES me, literally. I do not want to do it.

The thought of death is more comforting to me than the thought of chemotherapy.

I have many people who love me and have surrounded me with prayer; I am so grateful. So while I still feel going to God seems so much better, I am going to try to fight my fear.

Fuck cancer.

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